stories & opinions: Why do I love a married man?

I work with this guy whom I absolutely adore. He is 7 years younger than me and married. We have worked together for years and know each other pretty good. Our values and morals are almost exactly the same. Our logic is so similar it is really scary. About five months ago we started having an affair. There is a connection between us that I can not explain. The attraction is off the chart and its both ways. Do not get me wrong he is not a cheater and I know what you must be thinking. For several years I teased him because I knew he would not cheat and it was a challenge for me. Well I finally got him and its killing me more now than being rejected did. I told myself after I finally got him just once and we would never do it again. Well it did not work out like that. He really is a great guy and way too good for me. His wife has cheated on him several times but until the last incident he never would. I am open minded and I'm almost certain its just a mental thing for me. I know I really love him. I have just recently been trying to end things between us but its really hard. The reason I did is I'm afraid he will divorce her and realize he didn't feel the way he thought he did for me. Having him would be a fairy tale but my prince has another princess. I'm ashamed to admit it but the reason I ended it now is they just had their second baby and I'm scared he will leave her. Why am I so hung up on this guy? What kind of character flaw is it? Do I just like punishing myself and if that's it how do I stop? Our relationship is so much deeper than this. The connection is so real. Our coworkers have told us both they can tell we have strong feelings for each other by the way we look at each other. I need help before I ruin this guys life by not being able to say no. I'm 33 and have been married twice. The first was abusive and the second one developed a drug problem and would not get help. My head is sorta on my shoulders straight. I know people can convince themselves of almost anything so how do I convince myself I do not love him and get over it. Wait, he will always hold the key to my heart without a doubt. I told him once that I thought when everyone was born you were given half a heart. Your heart with have scar and many different features that reflect everything about you from morals, to what you enjoy doing, to values and just everything about you even your attitude. I told him ours was almost a perfect match and you never found that. Less friction in a relationship. How do I let my prince charming go? We have told each other we loved each other 3 years ago when he was separated from his wife the first time but after she got done with her boyfriend she wanted him back. He went for his son. I have let him go more than once and he always comes back, I try to resist but never do for long. If you love them let them go.

 If they love you they will come back and he has. He told me that it literally scared him from how we think alike. When he is acting funny all I have to do is put myself in his spot and I always figure out what is bothering him without him telling me. And he can read me even better than I can him. I am almost sure that sooner or later they will split anyway but not sure if I'll be around because we live in different counties. I truly love him and is it ok to just go for it and let it be his choice. I do love him enough to give up my happily ever after for him and I know I will never find this again in anyone else. It's rare. A guy that works with us tells me all the time we are the same. We love the same. By that I mean we put the other before ourselves. What do I do? I'm getting tired of worrying about everyone else and I'm about ready to try and claim what will complete me like no one else ever will. HELP!!