The Cultured lady

“Hey lady!” This is the way every average woman wants to be addressed. The matured female population often want to be addressed and rightly treated by the opposite sex but how many are ready to do those things that will “command” the respect and conduct from them? These days, how many women are knowledgeable when it comes to simple etiquette?

 

Simple etiquette aren’t about good cloths and makeups, neither is it expensive bags and shoes. You may wear the most expensive designer and still be the object of mockery. You aren’t a lady because you have good cash in the bank to command undependability, neither can been married to the richest man in town do the magic.

 

Being a lady is more about your carriage; how you sit, walk, stand, talk, look, laugh, choice of dressing, respond to incidents, interact with others, and so on. Let’s have a closer look.

• A lady does not fight or exchange words in public. It is so shameful when decently dressed ladies exchange words in public and, in some cases step into the madness of fighting.

• A lady eats honorably in public gatherings; and doesn’t target the “over flows” at parties. You think people don’t see you but your name is all over the place and that has become your trade-mark. Men notice you and mark you as “anything for the belly…with money/food and I’ve got her”.
• A lady knows how to fix breakfast, lunch, and dinner for family and friends; she spends less on restaurants. No matter how greatly the modern world is trying to change this…it remains a bitter truth.
• A lady doesn’t go vulgar; she knows what not to say. Some women are now worse than hoodlums and thugs when it comes to the dirty words pouring out of their mouths. The senseless ways and words used in greeting…all in the name of informality. It doesn’t stop there, women now nickname themselves which plainly points them to be indecent ill-mannered females.
• A lady doesn’t get involved in illegal transacts; either for association or money. Drugs, human trafficking, prostitution or call-girls aren’t for ladies…they are just disgrace to womanhood.
• A lady cultures the best habits like brushing last thing at night as a must and gets her man to imbibe the tradition.
• A lady dances, but never like a maniac or psychiatric patient. When it comes to alcohol or smoking…you know that’s a stretch.
• A lady treats her body specially and so doesn’t open her legs to every Tom, Dick, and Harry. A lady never sells her body for better grades, contracts or employment opportunity.
• A lady wipes gently, with wet wipes, her private part after urination. How many women know what it means to have wipes in their handbags? Most women now bother more about designer makeup but never about hygienic body care.
• A lady dress and courteously flaunts her good curves without exposing what should be covered. She wears what accentuates her body and beauty without selling herself cheap.
• A lady uses her makeup to enhance her beauty not look like a masquerade or appear like a work of art. A lady further knows better than to bleach.
• A lady knows her weaves needs to be well kept and free from smelling so as not to suffocate her man.
• A lady surely doesn’t wear dirty underwear. She prefers cotton for long days because they help her breath well and avoid smelling.
• Lady and conspicuous tattoos don’t go together….not even in poetry. You don’t see tattoos on royals!
• A lady doesn’t try to feign wealth…courtesy, cherished virtues and humility are her flaunted wealth. She’s never ashamed of her background and won’t change it to please men/society.

Long goes the traits of lady etiquette. Last line is…the feminine features on your body do not make you a lady…neither would you find an ill-mannered lady. The name lady is reserved for the well-mannered females.

NEVER make a PROMISE you cannot fulfill

Don't promise what you can't bring to eventuality. Only say what is within your limit. As people seek to be loved or accepted in a relationship, they often tend to magnify their capacities. This is utterly wrong. You do not need to make false promises to people for the sakes of having their approval. This will only make your partner see you as a dishonest person and or feel unworthy with you.

In a bid to be accepted, do what you can do and promise what you can fulfil. Be it little, its better and you would be seen as a man/lady of your words in all aspects of the relationship.

Never expect EVERYTHING from your relationship

Failure to meet your expectations could bring about disappointments. A lot of people usually expect their partner to satisfy all their needs. For instance, your partner cannot give you joy no matter how caring or affectionate they might be. If your joy is not from the inside, no one else can make you joyful. Don't make your expectations "too" high. They are human and cannot meet all. But when you have fairly normal expectations, you won't have much of heartache or emotional trauma.

Remember, moral standard and high expectations are two very different things. You should compromise your moral standards because of a relationship. Tons of people that have done that regretted it on the long run. 

Communicate your FEELINGS.

Don't assume your partner would know how you feel. Many people think their partner should know how they feel, what they are thinking of and their mood. However, this usually does not work as we think. Unless you're dating a mind reader, you really should not make that assumption. You need to find the right avenue to discuss how you feel. Assumptions do not solve issues it... only compound problems.

Don't do it alone, INVOLVE GOD

If you really want that relationship to last longest, you need to go spiritual on it. It is believed that a threefold cord is not easily broken. Who you share intimacy with in your relationship determines the strength of your relationship. Most of us involve friends, parent or colleagues in our relationship but their contribution usually affects us negatively. When you involve God in the affairs of your relationship, He will give you the strength and wisdom to handle any issues. Don't believe you can do it successfully without God.

 

6 Virtues In A Good Woman

The basic need a man really wants to correctly satisfy is the want of a good woman by his side. Men have just as hard time trying to find a good woman as women have trying to find a good man.

Women have to kiss frogs in order to find a Prince and men have to wade through pools of women, who for the sake of the cleanliness of this article we will just say crazy women, worthless woman, b's, h's, gold diggers, and you fill in the blanks.

A good woman is comprised of much more than being a woman who keeps a clean house and puts a hot meal on the table.. Things like that are nice and pretty much a necessity depending on the relationship, but they are only the basics. Many women say they want a good man but have you asked yourself if you're a good woman? Here are a few traits of a good woman.

1. ENCOURAGING/SUPPORTIVE/MOTIVATES - A good woman isn't quiet without input. She's full of ideas to help improve your life, career, business, outlook in dressing and overall health. She supports her man's ideas and motivates him to accomplish his goals. A good woman is a good listener. Ultimately she is able to change you without trying. A good woman makes you a better man.

2. SHE KEEPS HIM HONEST - A man is not allowed to be lazy when he's in a relationship with a good woman. If you tend to make excuses for why you can't do something a good woman will call you out on your bedside and make you shape up. If you want a promotion, but claim to not be able to get one she will quickly let you know that in all honestly you're not doing enough. A good woman will always encourage her man to make an honest living that he can be proud of. Most importantly she knows how to talk to him and tell him these things without being down on him.

3. KING HIM - Feeding your man grapes, strawberries and parading around in little enticing outfits is delightful, but what about providing him with some mental stimulation. A good woman not only speaks to the King in her man, but she also treats him as such. She sees potential in him. She treats you like he is the most capable and deserving man in the world, in addition to spoiling and catering to him in the most feminine way. A good woman will often make a man feel like he's the only man who exists in her eyes.

A good woman sees greatness in her King. She thinks he's amazing and makes him feel as such. She will have him feeling like anything is possible, like he could actually change the world. Imagine that... or simply google Barack Obama

4. SHE'S SECURE - A good woman is secure within herself and not easily jealous over other women. She's not quick to put the next woman down just because she thinks the woman looks good and provides competition to her own looks. No man wants an insecure woman who is always messing up his business deals because she thinks he's flirting with or having intimate relations with the women he works with.

5. STABILITY - Women often look for stability in a man. What they don't know is that it's their characteristics as a woman that cause a man to become stable. Most relationships are temporary, you actually know they will expire any minute. She makes him think about a future with her. A good woman will make you think of your goals and plans and make sure they are in alignment with what you want out of life. If a woman wants a stable man then she needs to be stable herself. That's one of the top signs of a good woman

6. ALLERGIC TO GOLD DIGGING - A good woman doesn't require that you buy her expensive gifts in order to obtain or maintain her affection. She's just as happy with sentimental gifts from a man as she would be with a gift of Louboutin shoes. It's not all about money with her, it's all about you and the man whom you are.

There is power in a good woman who can push her man to new heights and when a man finds a good woman that's when those should wedding bells start ringing..

5 Ways To Attract The Right People Into Your Life

Whether love life, business, or friendship — attraction follows pretty much the same rules. And they might not be what you think.Ready to finally start attracting the right people into your life? Follow these five tips:

1. Get clear on who you are, not who you're told to be.

So often, our desires are a lot more aligned with society's expectations than with what we really want. Is a good-looking guy or girl really your top priority? What about a sense of humor? Do you really want to work around the clock for that rich client? Or would a relaxed atmosphere with a little less money work for you?

2. Picture your ideal, and be specific.

You can't get what you want if you don't know what it is in the first place. Start thinking about the exact person you want to attract into your business or your life. Remember, you're the only one setting the rules here, so the sky's the limit. Be specific on everything from their secret passions to their inner fears. When you know what you're looking for, you're a lot more likely to find it.

3. Get really good at repelling people.

The most common barrier to attracting people into your business or life is trying to please everyone. If you're keeping everyone happy, then you're not being special to anyone. When you are authentically yourself, some people are inevitably going to be repelled. And that's a good thing. Once you start sending away the wrong fits, you're making room for the right ones to come in.

4. Let yourself be found.

Think of it this way: You're a lighthouse calling the ships in. If you don't shine your light bright enough, no one's going to be able to find you. So put yourself out there. Place yourself in situations where you can be found. Introduce yourself to everyone. Be as much of yourself as you possible when you first meet. Give the right people a chance to find you.

5. Be open to whatever comes along.

At the end of the day, business or love might not come in the form that we expected. But that doesn't mean that it's a bad fit. If you're putting yourself out there authentically, watch who starts coming into your life. Sometimes who we are attracting can teach us a lot about ourselves that we didn't know. And it might be a better fit than we expected.

At this exact moment, there's at least one person out there looking for exactly what you are. Whether it's a client, lover, or just a friend — somebody is trying to find you.

So give them a chance. Put yourself out there. The good, the bad, and the ugly, be authentic. Don't just be another carbon copy of someone else. Show people exactly who you are, so the right fits can find you.

When you open up and put yourself out there authentically, you don't have to wait six months to find out something isn't a fit. You'll create a business you're proud of and a life you'll love right now. And that already sounds attractive, doesn't it?

Stand Out From The Crowd

Many people claim “this is my style”, “that’s just my choice”, “I’m not like anyone, it’s just my fashion”; but the truth is when they step out into the crowd, they just fade into the crowd. Why? Simply because there’s no distinction between them and the society. In other words, the society has found a cunny way of dictating the lifestyle of people, leaving them with the choice of toning it up or down.

In relationships, many people join the crowd just so they can join the discussion when friends are talking about their partners; they don’t want to be the odd one out. This has landed many people in grave trouble emotionally, academically, morally, and even financially.

Others date partners whose character they don’t condone; they choose partners based on the "societal credibility". Dating someone because you feel the people around you would respect, or accept you more just because you are dating a particular caliber of person is not just wrong but also considered sick. Further expecting such relationship to be long or constructive to their lives is pure fallacy. (This is why most celebrities are either breaking up now or divorcing later)

 

You need to be original in as many areas of your live as possible...especially your relationships! Who you choose to date; why you choose to date the person; why that time; what do you expect from that person and why you expect such from the person; what you hope to gain; among other questions.

Standing out for a belief or way of life has never been easy but always has its advantages at the end. You need to pay the distressful price just so you can have the treasured commodity. That’s the simple truth. Then at the right time, you would smile for been as patient and courageous as you chose to be.  

4 Things Not To Say To/Ask A Woman

1. Never Tell a Girl to Calm Down

Do you realise what you've done!?!? You just said the C word. Prepare for world chaos. When a man tells a woman to 'calm down', usually its right in the middle of her expressing something that she cares about to him, and to be shut-down with a form of 'relax', will absolutely boil her blood. Whenever you say this, it usually has the opposite effect. You may as well say 'fire up and get angry please', then maybe she will 'calm down' due to how shocked she is over what you just said?

2. Don't Say Anything Bad About Her Guy Friends

There's nothing a girl hates more when you start talking smack about her guy friends, or start dissing her male friends especially when you don't know them well or haven't even met them! This is like getting a red market and writing 'INSECURE' all over your face. Girls like a man with confidence, and when you start getting jealous about her guy friends, it's best to keep your mouth shut. No guy likes it, I know, but it's something we have to put up with. Be confident, if you're not jealous, she will like you even more!

3. I'll Call You Later

We all do it, but do we realise the damage we are causing? You may think it's a good idea to end a conversation with I'll call you later, that's fine, if it's someone other than a girl! But what you have now done is destroyed her chances of calling you in between that time, because technically you have taken charge in saying I WILL CALL YOU, so if she tries to call you now, it will make her seem desperate. GOOD ONE!

4. How many guys have you slept with?

STOP. Do you REALLY want to know the answer to that question? Or will it forever haunt your dreams forever? IT WILL. It's best to not even go there. First of all, you are going to seem insecure again, especially if you ask this right at the start of your relationship, and most guys do! However, if she asks you this question first, as much as you want to ask, I WOULDN'T. Because you don't want to be the one to start this conversation, it leads to the sex questions. Then you start asking what have you done? And now you will regret asking this question!

Chasing the Truth..

We have always had an obsession with truth; with understanding things correctly. More often than not, never have we been satisfied to accept anyone's word for anything. EVERYTHING MUST BE PROVEN; and we believe this is a wise way for everyone to live. If someone says such and such is good, or this and that are bad, we always ask "Why?". We almost NEVER take things on authority. Its our understanding that many people are not honest, and some who are honest are simply mistaken. The higher you go in terms of power, the more reason people have to manipulate you for the sake of their own agendas.

Historically, whenever a significant paradigm shift has occurred, it was strongly opposed by nearly everyone on every side. And yet in the end, the grounds for the shift were proven to be valid.

"Always go to the source/sources of an issue. Dig until you reach the bottom and have ALL the information on a matter. Only then will you be in a competent position to make your own judgment. Also, expect very few to agree with you, and nearly all to mock you. But trust in yourself, or rather, trust in your openness to seek and accept the truth, whatever it turns out to be. You must vow to follow truth wherever it leads, for its own sake."

This takes courage, because truth can be painful; it can turn our world and beliefs upside down. If you truly do your own work, if you will have the courage, discipline, strength, and INTELLECTUAL HONESTY to thoroughly investigate a matter, you can feel secure in your conclusions.

This takes hard work, much time, and complete honesty, but your reward is truth and personal freedom.

Dating the "Right-Wrong person"

We're all seeking that special person who is right for us. But if you've been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there's no right person, just different flavors of wrong. Why is this? Because you yourself are 'wrong' in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way. But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness.

And it isn't until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems the ones that make you truly who you are that we're ready to find a lifelong mate. Only then do you finally know what you're looking for. You're looking for the wrong person. But not just any wrong person: the right wrong person someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, "This is the problem I want to have." I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way.? have a great day everyone!?

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 13

The excuses for why you haven't started.

The feeling you get from taking the first step is far better than the feeling you get from sitting around thinking about it.  So get up and get moving.  Take the first step this year – just one small step forward.  The greatest miracle of your success will not be that you finished, it will be that you had the courage to begin.

The future starts TODAY, not tomorrow

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 12

The way you expected things to be.

Life is about laughing and learning through good times and bad.  It's about growing through whatever comes your way and looking back with a smile.  You're stronger because of the hard times, wiser because of your mistakes, and happier because you have known sadness.  The same is true for everyone else.

So stay strong.  Even when it feels like everything is falling apart, you can either let it define you, destroy you, or let it strengthen you.  Things change for the better.  Just believe and roll with it.  It won't always be easy, but it will be worth it in the end.  When you finally let go of the past and what did or didn't happen, something better comes along.  Oftentimes what you're looking for comes when you're not looking at all.

The future starts TODAY, not tomorrow

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 11

The dream that everything should be easy.

The ones who fall and get up are so much stronger than the ones who never fell.  Often it's the deepest pain that empowers human beings to rise and grow into their highest selves.  The ones who win the race in the long run are usually not the quickest or slickest, but the ones who have endured the most.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 9

Illusions of safety.

You have to take risks.  You will only realize the full potential of your life when you allow the unexpected to happen.  Living itself is risky business.  Every decision, every interaction, every step, every time you get out of bed in the morning, you take a risk.  To truly live is to know you're getting up and taking that risk.  To not get out of bed, clutching to illusions of safety, is to die slowly without ever having truly lived.  Be a little risky and realize the full potential of your life.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 8

Senseless busy work.

Incessant busyness is often a sign of ineffectiveness and laziness.  Because it's easy to be busy – just partake in a bunch of random activities that drains all your time.  Doing so justifies never having enough time to clean, cook for yourself, go out with friends, meet new people, etc.  Right?  Wrong.  Don't just get things done; get the right things done.  Results are always more important than the time it takes to achieve them.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 7

Old, comfortable routines.

Remember, the way you've always done it isn't the only way.  It's unlikely that one of the things you'll regret when you're 80 is not having consumed enough beer in your 20s, or not having bought enough $9 lattes in your 30s, or not having frequented the same chain restaurants for your entire 40s, etc.  But the regret of missing out on opportunities is a real, toxic feeling.  You've figured out drinking and going out.  You've had enough lattes.  You know what the hamburger at Applebee's tastes like.  It's time to figure something else out.  Every corner you turn or street you walk down has a new experience waiting for you.  You just have to see the opportunity and be adventurous enough to run with it.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 6

All that stuff for sale you don't need.

Too many people buy things they don't need with money they don't have to impress people they don't know.  Don't be one of them.  Stop buying stuff on impulse!  Avoid the mall!  The mall is not a source of entertainment.  It's a source of personal debt.  There's no reason to tease yourself by staring at a bunch of brand new junk you don't need.  And as you know, the novelty of a new purchase wears thin long before the credit card bill arrives.

So as I've said before, live a comfortable life, not a wasteful one.  Do not spend to entertain yourself or impress others.  Do not fool yourself into thinking wealth is measured in material objects.  Manage your money wisely so your money does not manage you.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 5

What you don't have, and may never have.

Focus on the resources you do have access to.  It all begins and ends in your mind.  What you give power to has power over you, if you allow it.  Too many of us are hung up on what we don't have, can't have, or won't ever have.  We spend too much energy being down, when we could use that same energy – if not less of it – doing, or at least trying to do, some of the things we really want to do.  So focus on the opportunities you DO have and exploit the resources you DO have access to.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 4

The big expectations clouding your mind.

Whatever you're waiting for – peace of mind, contentment, grace, an inner awareness of abundance – it will surely come to you, but only when you're ready to receive it with an open and grateful heart.  So be as grateful as possible, for small things, not just for big things – for the simple act of breathing, the time together, the conversations, etc.  Every moment counts.  Every second matters.  Whatever is given is a gift.  Make the most of it.