Simple Relationship Guide

• There is no such thing as a model relationship. Every relationship is unique. What works for you may not work for another.

• Some men are lazy around the house. Some men are hardworking and helpful; they hate to stress their wives. Most women will pray for the latter but forget that helpful or not, most men have their own ways of showing love and care. Respect counts.

• Marriage is for better, for worse; i.e. it is a lifetime contract. So if your wife becomes fat (from having your children) or she turns out to be dirty or lazy or displays any other habit you detest, it's no reason to hit her, cheat on her or kill her!

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here we should dance.

• Your new woman or man may be worse. (This happens very often). So you'll keep on divorcing & remarrying? Marriage is about making the most of who/what you have. Remember: The devil you know is better than the angel you don't know.

• Looking for whom to settle down with? Choose someone who makes you smile & laugh; someone who makes you happy without even trying. But first, remember there is only one person you spend your whole life with, and that is yourself. If you aren't ok with you, there is an issue.

• Make time to discover yourselves. Don't marry because of a pregnancy; marry because you know that you can tolerate your lover.

• Love is important but not enough. Always remember P.E.T: they will help you through the tough times and you'll enjoy the good too!

• When children arrive,make them a common hobby. You both must enjoy spending time with them. They are very important in your life.

• If the children don't come,spoil each other silly. When you are both happy,other things fall in place. You may adopt or help others.

• When you both truly care about and respect each other, your marriage will work. Be considerate of your partner's feelings always.

• Don't keep "all" your relationship issues and problems to yourselves. "Some" issues require a third party. Contrary to public opinion, share with someone you respect. 'All' and 'some' are the key words here.
***Note that"a third party" could be your own offspring. Some children are way wiser than their parents. You'd be amazed at the advice.

• Never,Ever,Ever,Ever quit your marriage (unless for attempted murder which may still be fixed depending on the situation though).
If you ever once truly loved each other (not fondness, deep care or great respect); you can rekindle the romance. Don't give up!

• Sometimes, it's best to wait out a cheating partner. Someday, he/she will be back. Not all lost sheep get eaten up. Some lost sheep sometimes find their way back home ...but they come back dirty, smelly and with the sense of the wild. Its then your choice if you still want him/her or not.

• Good friends are necessary to keep your sanity. Marriage can be frustrating sometimes, so go have some fun without your partner.

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN LIFE ISN'T MARRIAGE BUT PURPOSE.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 10

Fears of defeat.

Fear of being defeated is what warrants your defeat.  A fear of not being good enough is what guarantees that you never will be.  If you never pick up that keyboard, or pencil, or paintbrush, or whatever instrument you use to craft your work, because you're afraid that someone else might do it better than you, your prediction will automatically come true.

Remember, defeat is not the worst of failures.  Not having tried at all is as bad as it gets.  And as far as failure itself is concerned, you're not obligated to succeed or fail.  You're obligated to keep trying – to do the best you can do every day.  That's all.  And you're always good enough to do that.

6 Most Common Relationship Regrets

Relationships have so much in it; the beginning, the going and the 'after that'. Physically and emotionally, there are bound to be regrets. For men and women, the regrets differ.

Here were the three most common regrets for men:

-          Being too shy to make a move on a prospective sexual partner

-          Not being more sexually adventurous when they were young

-          Not being more sexually adventurous when they were single

And here were the three most common regrets for women:

-          Losing their virginity to the wrong partner

-          Cheating on a present or past partner 

-          Moving too fast sexually

More women than men even said having sex with an unattractive partner was their top regret.

What are yours? 

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 9

Illusions of safety.

You have to take risks.  You will only realize the full potential of your life when you allow the unexpected to happen.  Living itself is risky business.  Every decision, every interaction, every step, every time you get out of bed in the morning, you take a risk.  To truly live is to know you're getting up and taking that risk.  To not get out of bed, clutching to illusions of safety, is to die slowly without ever having truly lived.  Be a little risky and realize the full potential of your life.

After Discovering Your Cheating Partner

Don't get down to that level; you are better off without him.

Due to the passionate love some people have towards their partner, they tend to "flip" at the shock of realisation that their partner is having an affair. Instead:

• Be grateful you found out the true person of him/her instead of been continuously fooled

• Plan a way to create a future with someone more deserving.

• Live a rather radiant life that when the unfaithful ex hears or sees you, it would inflict self pain on him/her.

A bad partner/relationship isn't the end of life for you. You can take some steps back, and more carefully choose the type of person you want to be with. Avoid the old mistakes and don't be in a hurry to "secure" a partner. This is the mistake many often make.

 

If you have a problem with me...

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 8

Senseless busy work.

Incessant busyness is often a sign of ineffectiveness and laziness.  Because it's easy to be busy – just partake in a bunch of random activities that drains all your time.  Doing so justifies never having enough time to clean, cook for yourself, go out with friends, meet new people, etc.  Right?  Wrong.  Don't just get things done; get the right things done.  Results are always more important than the time it takes to achieve them.

People Really Don't Change..

Vulnerable Moment In A Man’s Life

When the man started to see his future wife, things were stop-and-go and then stop again. One of their early dates was a camping trip. The man's future wife was going camping with eight of her closest friends, and the man was welcome to join them. It seemed the man's future wife didn't want a date. She wanted a friend—a friend who liked camping, which the man didn't. But the man went along because the heart is foolish.

One by one, the man's future wife's friends pulled out of the camping trip, so that soon it was just the man and his future wife and one of his future wife's friends, who happened to have the same first name as the man and had known the man's future wife since they were 16. It was the three of them in a pup tent made for two; the man was the odd man out. The man's future wife had forgotten her toothbrush, so the man offered her his. It was the single romantic gesture in a wholly unromantic weekend. The man and his future wife, the man was sure, would never see each other again.

Two weeks later, the man ran into his future wife in the rain, and it was as if they'd had a one-night stand. Here was a girl who had used his toothbrush, and now they couldn't so much as speak. When he got home, the man phoned his future wife and said, "What happened? I thought we liked each other. I thought you liked me." The man was so scared he thought he might hyper-ventilate. Because what if his future wife didn't like him back? The man wouldn't be able to live with the humiliation. You need to make yourself vulnerable, the man told himself, because there is no love without vulnerability. That was why the man made that phone call.

This is the part of the story that's not true. It was the man's future wife who made that phone call. She was the one who said those words. But the man, being a man, wished he had said them. He was thinking of them, but he needed someone to show him how.

"You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 7

Old, comfortable routines.

Remember, the way you've always done it isn't the only way.  It's unlikely that one of the things you'll regret when you're 80 is not having consumed enough beer in your 20s, or not having bought enough $9 lattes in your 30s, or not having frequented the same chain restaurants for your entire 40s, etc.  But the regret of missing out on opportunities is a real, toxic feeling.  You've figured out drinking and going out.  You've had enough lattes.  You know what the hamburger at Applebee's tastes like.  It's time to figure something else out.  Every corner you turn or street you walk down has a new experience waiting for you.  You just have to see the opportunity and be adventurous enough to run with it.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 6

All that stuff for sale you don't need.

Too many people buy things they don't need with money they don't have to impress people they don't know.  Don't be one of them.  Stop buying stuff on impulse!  Avoid the mall!  The mall is not a source of entertainment.  It's a source of personal debt.  There's no reason to tease yourself by staring at a bunch of brand new junk you don't need.  And as you know, the novelty of a new purchase wears thin long before the credit card bill arrives.

So as I've said before, live a comfortable life, not a wasteful one.  Do not spend to entertain yourself or impress others.  Do not fool yourself into thinking wealth is measured in material objects.  Manage your money wisely so your money does not manage you.

Incidents & Opinions: I Don't Like My Girlfriend's Mode Of Dressing.

I so much hate the way my girlfriend dresses. I've complained over and over again but it seems I'm not getting through to her. She doesn't think a woman can be sexy without showing body parts. Her clothes are skimpy, trashy and disgusting. They are all either too short, too tight, bosom on display, her favourite are transparent clothes. Those kinds of clothes are fine if you're standing on the streets but not when you are going out with your man. I get very uncomfortable when we go out. She likes all the attention she gets from people when we go out but I am embarrassed. I do not want to be seen in public with a girl dressed that way but because I care a lot about her I still haven't broken up with her. What can I do about this lady? I really want her in my life. Minus the dressing, everything else about her is perfect. My kind of woman. Please advise.

*culled from LIB*

 

Life Counsel:

- When you first laid eyes on her, she was dressing just this way, and you had no problem with her sense of dressing, so why complain now?
- When you started dating her, she was dressing just this way, and you became attracted to her, but yet STILL had no problem with her sense of dressing, so why complain now?
- Now she is your girlfriend and you suddenly realise she dresses indecently?!

- You have to take this girl for ALL she is and WHO she is, and nothing else. You cannot pick what you like about her, and ask her to change what you don't.

 

There's no point in trying to change her because that's what will come back in lighting speed when you guys have disagreements. I'll say just accept her like this or move on with your life.

Golden Tip:

 The only time change is good in your partner is when and if he/she chooses to change for personal reasons.

Betrayal..

On the humor side..

Perfect Marriage..

You also need to remember this

Crossroad: Walk Away or Try Harder

This is not an uncommon crossroad for many people. Of course relationships are filled with ups and downs; not to mention many are times you need to persevere through some tough times. Whenever you are at the point of making tough decisions, remember they are not meant to make you feel good immediately but on the long run. This is the first confirmation that your decision is right. If it so convenient and easy to pick that option out of the choices you have, then it is likely that isn't the right one.

Joy surely awaits every painstaking decision you make. Of a truth, there are times you need to swallow your pride (when you are wrong), or give chances for a adjustments because no one is perfect. It is equally important to remember you are better off without some people in your life. Some relationships have to fall off for better ones to come out.

 

Cheers..  

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 5

What you don't have, and may never have.

Focus on the resources you do have access to.  It all begins and ends in your mind.  What you give power to has power over you, if you allow it.  Too many of us are hung up on what we don't have, can't have, or won't ever have.  We spend too much energy being down, when we could use that same energy – if not less of it – doing, or at least trying to do, some of the things we really want to do.  So focus on the opportunities you DO have and exploit the resources you DO have access to.

Future Plans..

Future plans may and should not be appreciated in the present.

We just need to..

We need to teach our DAUGHTERS the difference

between

the man who flatters her

and a man who compliments her.

A man who spends money on her

and a man who invests in her.

A man who views her as property

and a man who views her properly.

A man who lusts after her

and a man who LOVEs her.

A man who believes he is God's gift to women

and a man who remember a woman was God's gift to man.

We equally and importantly need to teach our sons to be

that kind of MAN

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 4

The big expectations clouding your mind.

Whatever you're waiting for – peace of mind, contentment, grace, an inner awareness of abundance – it will surely come to you, but only when you're ready to receive it with an open and grateful heart.  So be as grateful as possible, for small things, not just for big things – for the simple act of breathing, the time together, the conversations, etc.  Every moment counts.  Every second matters.  Whatever is given is a gift.  Make the most of it.

When the goal is sensible...

Married men and Dating Sites.

Should a married man be seen on dating network sites?

Different men have different take on this issue. This isn't a like "some go to the river for fish while others go for the view". This situation is much more sensitive than that and really shouldn't not be debased to such.

A married man has a wife if not children. When he starts having undue "attachments" with single ladies that have next to no restrains, he's bound to development 'whorish interest' in a couple of them. To state the obvious, that is just the definition of cheating. Certainly, no marital vow has 'permission' for 'flings'.

Why get yourself close to temptation if you say you don't intending failing?

Would you be surprised if you wife doesn't trust you? You know the saying "think of the worst, and surprising you'll be right."

 

Share your views: Post your Opinions and Comments below!

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 3

Your desire to win everyone's approval.

Your ideas and choices don't have to be on everyone's "approved" list.  Regardless of the opinions of others, at the end of the day the only reflection staring back at you in the mirror is your own.  Make sure you're proud of who that person is.  Approach others with the belief that you're a good person, whether they respond positively or not.  It's normal to want people to like you, but it becomes a self-imposed burden when too much of your behavior is explicitly designed to constantly reassure you of their approval.

Three Simple Rules.

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 2

Insensitive thoughts.

Always be kinder than necessary.  What goes around comes around.  No one has ever made themselves strong by showing how small someone else is.  Whatever can be done, can be done more effectively when you add kindness.  Whatever words are spoken, will always be more compelling when expressed with kindness.

The kind deeds you exert in just one moment can have a positive impact that lasts a lifetime.  Your days will be brighter and your years fuller when you add kindness to your purpose.  Choose to be kind every day, and you're truly choosing to live in a better world.

 

6 Things You Shouldn't Say To Single Friends

Whether you've just started dating someone or you're in a long-term relationship, it can be tempting to set friends up or discuss their private lives. While you may be open with your friends, there are some things that you should never say. Getting too private can seem condescending and you run the risk of losing your friends for good.

 

1. Anything to Do with Online Dating

You may have found the love of your life through online dating, but that doesn't mean your friend wants to try it. Yes, there are benefits, but you want to stay away from anything that involves this topic. While you think you're helping, you're friend sees it that she's not good enough without someone else in her life. Of course, if she brings it up as a subject, feel free to chat away about it.

 

2. Name Calling

You may tell her that she's being picky or is too hard to please, but that isn't going to help her. She'll feel hurt that you think that way. This is her life, and she wants to find Mr. Right. If you actually ask her about your must-haves when it came to dating, she may have thought you weren't picky enough. The last thing you want is her upsetting you by telling you your man isn't good enough.

 

3. Asking About an Ex

You may have loved her ex-boyfriend, but there was a reason why they broke up. Sometimes the breakups aren't because your friend wanted to end the relationship. Why bring up a past relationship, unless she is the one who starts the conversation about it?

 

4. The Marriage Question

Happily married women expect everyone to be in the same situation as them. They start asking their friends when they're getting married, or why they aren't married yet. Even those with boyfriends will find these questions hurtful and annoying. The choice of marriage isn't always their fault. Their boyfriends may not have popped the question yet, or they may be going through difficult periods in their relationships.

 

5. Talking About Getting Out There

There is a common feeling that single women aren't going everything they can to meet someone. A friend may comment on them being in the home all the time, or constantly at work. The problem is that you don't see your friend all the time. You don't know how actively she is looking for someone, or whether she even wants to find a man to add to her life. If you're trying to get her to meet a friend you have, encourage her to come to a party by telling her that there's someone you'd like her to meet.

 

6. Mentioning Age

This is a big no-no. You don't want to mention age, even if you mean it as a compliment. Saying "you're still young", is like saying, "you're getting on a bit and time is running out"; you may not mean it that way, but it's how it comes across. The best thing you can do is stay away from the age factor completely, unless she asks for your opinion; and then, tread carefully.  -The Trent

Relax, Breathe, Let go and Live

Things You Have to Forget to Get Ahead 1

The complicated ways of living.

Focus on the activities and people that make you happy, and filter out the avoidable opposites.  Truth be told, we often make our lives complicated when it's really quite simple:  Find what it is that makes you happy and spend more time doing it.  Find who it is that makes you smile and spend more time with them.

Living your dream is really just a matter of proper lifestyle alignment.  It's about being true to yourself, and realizing that where you are at any given moment is exactly where you want to be.  Thus, happiness and success in life is simply the gratifying combination of liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking who you do it with. 

Pope Francis Gives Message To Engaged Couples

"Dear young people, don't be afraid to marry. A faithful and fruitful marriage will bring you happiness." was the pontiff's twitter message to the masses. He further shed more light on some relationship and commitment subjects. 

 

1. Build Love 

"But what do we mean by 'love'? A mere emotion, a psycho-physical state? Certainly, if it is just this, it cannot provide the foundation for building something solid. But if instead love is a relationship, then it is a growing reality, and we can also say, by way of example, that it is built in the same way that we build a house. And we build a house together, not alone!" 

2. Commit To Forever

"Because 'forever' is not simply a question of duration! A marriage does not succeed just because it lasts; its quality is also important."

 

3. Living Together Requires Consideration and Care 

"[Living together is] an art, a patient, beautiful and fascinating journey … which can be summarized in three words: please, thank you and sorry. 'Please' is a kind request to be able to enter into the life of someone else with respect and care. … True love does not impose itself with hardness and aggression." 

 

4. Be Courteous and Grateful

St. Francis said that 'courtesy is the sister of charity, it extinguishes hatred and kindles love'. And today, in our families, in our world, often violent and arrogant, there is a need for far more courtesy. 'Thank you': gratitude is an important sentiment. Do we know how to say thank you?

5. Recognize Mistakes and Apologize Sincerely

"'Sorry'. In our lives we make many errors, many mistakes. We all do. … And this is why we need to be able to use this simple word, 'sorry'. In general we are all ready to accuse other sand to justify ourselves. It is an instinct that lies at the origins of many disasters. Let us learn to recognize our mistakes and to apologize."

6. Don't Expect Perfection

"We are all aware that the perfect family does not exist, nor does the perfect husband, nor the perfect wife."

7. Your Marriage Is More Important Than Your Wedding

"At the same time, it is good for your wedding to be sober and to emphasize that which is truly important. Some people are more concerned with external signs, with the banquet, the dress… These are important aspects of a feast, but only if they are able to indicate the true reason for your joy: the Lord's blessing upon your love."

8. Don't Go To Bed Angry

"Do not end any day without asking each other for forgiveness, having peace back in your house and your family. Never end a single day without being at peace with each other. This is the secret in order to preserve love."

Hope you got something from it?

PEOPLE'S MISTAKES; Stop whining and move forward

People make mistakes and hurt people. When people are hurt, people are in trouble and tend to make the wrong choices. But those choices don't have to define you; they don't have to define your family. This is because there's always one moment when you can turn it all around.
If the dead could come back to correct their lives again, they would do things differently. However, time ran out for them. Quite sad, but not for you.
Individuals living with the consequences of other people's hurting mistakes have one thing in common. What the 'wrong doers' did then is on them; but what you the 'wronged' do now is on you. So, would you still hold on to the 'passing-blame' game or just move on and make something big out the mistakes in your life? 

When your teeth bites your tongue, do you pluck them out or you suck up the pain and eat on?

The mistakes can be in career, intimate relationship, social reactions and what have we. Whatever it might be, its all about your reaction.

The call is and would always be yours to make.

Life & Love - 3

Somewhere there's someone who dreams of your smile, and finds in your presence that life is worthwhile. So, when you are lonely remember it's true: somebody somewhere is thinking of you.

No man is worth a woman's tears; the only one that is, will never make her cry.

If you love somebody then tell them how you feel. Don’t be scared of their reaction or rejection life is too short. You should take a chance and if things don’t work out as you plan, don’t worry because life moves on and true love will be waiting for you again.

Also, frequently take a look at what you have. Think of all you did to get it. And remember, it only takes one second to lose it.

"I've never been so scared of losing something in my life, then again nothing in my life has ever meant as much to me as you do!"

Yesterday is history, today is a gift, and tomorrow is a mystery. Live each day as though it were your last, with the things that are truly going to last. So, maybe it all happened for a reason, you going with her, me going with him, and in the end, you and I going back to each other. What's meant to be will always find a way.

"You have no idea how good it feels to wake up every morning knowing you are mine and I am yours. If you ever doubt my love for you, just put your ear to my heart and listen, it's calling your name....always and forever."

Life & Love - 2

One day you will ask me "which is more important, you or my life?" And I will say "my life", and you will walk away not knowing that you are my life.

As you surely know but easily have forgotten, life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

"Love is a way of living so how can our souls be healthy enough to live without love. I will continue to love you for as long as I have life because you've showed me the light. I always look forward to waking up in the morning because you're there waiting to love me again with your arms open wide waiting to embrace me with your love. The love I will strive to keep hold on forever. If God is the DJ, then Life is the dance floor; Love is the rhythm, and You are the music. I love you!!"

Trying to forget someone you love is like trying to remember someone you never met. But why do we love the ones who ignore us and ignore the ones who love us?

Some people believe that holding on and hanging in there are signs of strength. However, there are times in life in which it takes much more strength to just let go.

 

 

Life & Love - 1

Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right relationship. It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much love you build till the end.

Life is about trusting your feelings and taking chances, losing and finding happiness, appreciating the memories, learning from the past, and realizing people change.

"To be honest with you, I don't have the words to make you feel better, but I do have the arms to give you a hug, ears to listen to whatever you want to talk about, and I have a heart; a heart that's aching to see you smile again." - That's Love

"I'll always remember... I'll never forget, how you took my breath away, the first time we met. No matter what happens... no matter what we do, I'll always remember the first time I saw you." - That's commitment

"When I say I love you. You say you don't deserve it. When I say I need you . You say I deserve someone better, When I say my life is better with you. You say I don't know any better. But when I kiss you, you say I love you, When I have to go, you say I need you. When I am with you, you know, that there is no better feeling then our love coming together and that is something we both deserve." - That's facing reality

"I'll always be beside you until the very end, wiping all your tears away, being your best friend. I'll smile when you smile and feel all the pain you do, and if you cry a single tear, I promise I'll cry too." - That's reassurance

You can close your eyes to things you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to the things you don't want to feel. And sometimes what you want isn't always what you get, but in the end what you get is so much better than what you wanted.

Life is filled with happiness, sadness, tears, smiles, laughter and other emotions but when life gets you down, just be strong about it and keep your head up high and have faith in all things in life. Always remember: God is at your side, always.